Help! I suffer from DFS!!

Today I self-diagnosed myself with a serious condition called DFS.

DFS is a condition that, if left untreated, can result in.....
well, it can result in many more moments of me almost laughing out loud in the middle of a deposition. This is serious because the court reporter is supposed to draw very little attention to themselves...so a sudden outburst during testimony can really create an upset.

A DFS flare up can occur suddenly without warning and disappear just as quickly. When the afflicted realizes they have had an episode of DFS, the next physiological response is a sudden chuckle reflex that has to be quickly surpressed so as not to interrupt the deposition.

Sadly, I have not found any documentation of just how to treat or cure DFS.

So what is DFS? It stands for Drunken Finger Syndrome.

I found evidence of a DFS flare up in the current transcript I am working on. The phrase was supposed to be, "Portal to portal." To my dismay, a DFS episode caused me to write, "Portal to Fart al" See, it was someone's idea of a cruel joke to design steno theory such that the keys "T" and "P" are next to each other, and to make the "F" sound, you press down the T and P simultaneously. The other misfortune is that your left thumb is used for your two vowels A and O. So at times you may wish to write the words "part", "port", "fort", but your fingers get drunk and include the T or stroke "A" instead of "O"... making TPART, which is "Fart".

On the up side... the laughter you supress during a depo can be made up for at home in the editing process by cracking up when you find it again... that is... hopefully you find it again before it gets sent to the attorneys!!!!! he he he he